Only Baby Boomers Would Think These Things Are Cool

Baby boomers always complain about millennials whenever they have the chance. But what they don’t realize is that every generation is going to act the way they do regardless of what anyone says. After all, that’s exactly what baby boomers do anyway!

From wearing jorts to binge-watching 24-hour network news and HSN, these are things most people under the age of 40 wouldn’t admit to doing. But folks born between 1946 and 1964 insist that these things are still relevant. If you think any of the following things are significant today… you might be a baby boomer.

Just walk into any of their homes and you’ll probably see one particular channel on TV…

They Throw Down On Racquetball

Sandeep Reddy, of Longmont, Chris Hawley, of Longmont, and Vishwanath Mantha, of Erie, play on the racquetball court at the Ed and Ruth Lehman YMCA of Longmont.
Matt Jonas/Digital First Media/Boulder Daily Camera via Getty Images

If you have racquetball rooms in your local gym, chances are half of them are always occupied by a couple of middle-aged men throwing down in the spirit of some good old-fashioned competition.

We can’t see why you’d want to give up the open space of a tennis court to be stuck in a sweat-scented room hitting a ball against the wall but at the very least, racquetball is a good calorie-burning sport, so there’s that. But really, you hardly see anyone under the age of 50 playing this game.

24-Hour News Networks Only Cater To Them

Chris Wallace awaiting the arrival of former Vice President Al Gore on the set of
Paul Morigi/Getty Images

The ’50s were considered the Golden Age of Television but even then, they still had to wait another 30 years for 24-hour news networks to come around. Most people waited until the evening to get the news from their favorite reporter but in 1980 that all changed when CNN was founded as a 24-hour cable news channel.

By then, most baby boomers were in the prime of their adulthood and loved that they could stay up to date at all times of the day. But these days, they’re the only ones who ever watch those channels.

If it’s not network news they’re watching, then they’re likely getting their pocketbooks out while watching another certain channel…

They Won’t Leave Jorts Alone

Dad jorts
Twitter

Another polarizing article of clothing that baby boomers just insist on wearing is jorts. If you’ve never heard of the term for “jean shorts” then it’s likely you’re a baby boomer yourself who consistently commits this crime against fashion.

And we know what you’re thinking, But ladies wear denim shorts all the time! Sure, that’s true, because people really only take issue with jorts when some old dad wearing socks with sandals — or worse, Crocs — is trying to making you laugh with his embarrassingly corny jokes all the time.

Diamonds Are Incredibly Overrated

1950s GLAMOROUS WOMAN EYES CLOSED CHIN LIFTED PUTTING ON ELABORATE DIAMOND RHINESTONE NECKLACE
Debrocke/ClassicStock/Getty Images

They say that diamonds are a girl’s best friend – that is if she or someone she knows is wealthy enough to afford those diamonds. Baby boomers sold each other on the idea that “exclusive” and expensive diamonds were the only way to go.

Diamonds are actually quite common and easier to find than most precious gems. But demand increases as they’re slowly released in the market, making them wildly expensive. Even some of the biggest diamonds aren’t worth much if they don’t pass in terms of clarity, color, and cut.

They Love Their Cruises

baby-boomers-think-cool-01
Cameron Spencer/Getty Images

It’s easy to see why baby boomers love going on cruises. Not only do you get to visit new places, but you can also lay out by the pool or hit the buffet in the meantime. Cruises are usually all-inclusive and can take you throughout the Caribbean, Europe, or even Alaska.

The cruises themselves aren’t necessarily what’s uncool. It’s the fact that you’ll likely be trapped within a crowd of people on a boat the whole time that serves as the big caveat to going on a cruise.

Potpourri Is In All Of Their Homes

a glass bowl filled with potpourri
xikita/Flickr

Seriously, what is the deal with potpourri? We can understand the need to make your home smell pleasant but there are so many other ways to go about doing this. There are candles, aerosol sprays (which aren’t good for the environment, but still), and even a good old-fashioned spring cleaning that can make your house smell fresh.

It’s certainly better than having a bowl full of dead flower petals in your living room that once you stop smelling you’ll forget about and leave there to collect dust for the next seven months.

Potpourri isn’t the only thing that collects dust in a baby boomer’s home. See what else they think is cool to have on their shelves coming up!

Malls Aren’t What They Used To Be

A woman talking on a cell phone holding a Macy's bag at Westfield Shoppingtown Southlake.
Jeffrey Greenberg/UIG via Getty Images

Ever since the Internet allowed us to buy nearly anything we needed and have it delivered straight to our doors, shopping malls have become obsolete. At first, malls were a retail mecca where department stores reigned supreme. You’ll still find plenty of baby boomers roaming the mall, however, although we’re not sure why.

Now, you can buy stuff from Amazon without having to spend the gas money or trudge through crowds of aimless teens. Ironically, malls are becoming more and more uncool for that very reason.

They’re Easily Fooled By Conspiracy Theories

Man on a Cellphone Outside a Barbershop in Holliston, MA
Richard Berkowitz/Moment Mobile/Getty Images

From the moon landing to JFK’s assassination, conspiracy theories have long fed people the idea that these historic events and more were fake. While conspiracy theories are interesting, they’re still only theories. Still, there are plenty of people who believe them and a good percentage of those people are baby boomers.

These days baby boomers are more likely to believe conspiracy theories and spread “fake news” simply because they didn’t grow up with the technology that is available today, so they’re easily fooled. We guess we know why they rely on 24-hour news networks so much.

Home Shopping Channels Show Them All The “Cool” Things

sandals being sold on QVC
YouTube

If a baby boomer’s television set doesn’t have CNN or Fox News blaring out of it at all hours of the day, then it’s likely on QVC or HSN. These home shopping networks used to be the prime platform to get great deals on neat gadgets or jewelry with a celebrity’s name on it. But just like with shopping malls, online shopping has cut out the need for home shopping networks.

So why exactly are they still around? Apparently there’s a handful of baby boomers out there who still tune in.

Baby boomers love their home shopping. But do they love it as much as the reading material coming up next?

They Still Read Reader’s Digest

A copy of Reader's Digest magazine is displayed on a rack at a grocery store August 17, 2009 in San Anselmo, California.
Justin Sullivan/Getty Images

It’s been almost 100 years since Reader’s Digest became a thing and it’s a wonder why they’re even still around. How many people off the top of your head do you know actually read Reader’s Digest?

If you actually did have an answer for that, then you likely thought of your Aunt Susan, your grandpa, or maybe even your own mother. Reader’s Digest has filed for bankruptcy on numerous occasions over the last decade, yet somehow we still see new issues of it in line at the grocery store.

Golf Takes Itself Way Too Seriously

Five young men being taught how to play golf by an instructor circa 1950.
FPG/Getty Images

Golf may be a thrilling sport if you’re in your 60s, which is where most baby boomers are at these days. This non-endurance sport is popular among wealthy folk who like to pretend to take the game seriously while they discuss business matters.

When you watch golf in person you must stay incredibly quiet and walk long distances to follow the golfers through 18 holes. It sounds boring to watch in person which is why we can’t even fathom why anyone would enjoy watching the sport on television.

Baby Boomers Won’t Stop Wearing Crocs

The founders of Crocs footwear pose with a variety of their products at their Niwot offices.
Glenn Asakawa/The Denver Post via Getty Images

Crocs are one of the most polarizing articles of clothing around and baby boomers love them. They may be some of the most comfortable shoes (or are they sandals?) on the market but that doesn’t change their reputation for being ugly.

We mainly only see medical professionals or Mario Batali wearing these things, mainly because they’re on their feet all day. But baby boomers like to complain about a lot of things — especially their tired feet — so it’s no wonder why they like to wear Crocs so much.

Coming up, why would anyone want to have something dead smelling up their homes?

Procedural Police Shows Are All The Drama They Need

mariska hargitay in season 14 of law & order: svu
USA Network

When they’re not watching network news or home shopping, baby boomers are likely watching a procedural drama of some sort. They just love shows like NCIS, Law & Order, and all of those shows’ spin-offs.

While these shows can spark a bit of interest when you first start watching them, after a while you realize that each episode pretty much follows the same formula. After all, baby boomers are at that age where they prefer to know what to expect and you really can’t change their minds about it either.

Knickknacks Are Also A Waste Of Space

Knickknacks fill the garage in Ladera Ranch where workers prepare for an estate sale.
Mindy Schauer/Digital First Media/Orange County Register via Getty Images

If Marie Kondo was around when baby boomers were becoming adults, then we’d likely have very few knickknacks in this world. As is the case, Miss “Spark Joy” herself wasn’t around back then to convince baby boomers they didn’t need that mini Hawaiian hula dancer or that seventh hip-swinging Santa Claus.

This is why baby boomers often have a treasure trove of knickknacks lying around their house collecting dust. Unless they’re rare collector’s items, most of those knickknacks are uselessly taking up space too.

They Think China Adds To The Home

two women stand next to a china cabinet in walt disney world
Jared/Flickr

Another item on the list of useless home decor that baby boomers love is fine china. We can understand wanting to own an incredibly expensive set of dishes as some sort of status symbol, but what’s the point if you’re never going to use them?

Just like knickknacks and potpourri, baby boomers like to put fine china on display and let it collect dust for years on end. A lot of the time the china isn’t even tasteful and some might say that it’s just downright tacky.

Maybe baby boomers like to collect china and not use it because they’re too busy eating at the places you’ll see coming up.

They Still Get Shopping Catalogs In The Mail

ll bean, harry & david, and bed, bath, & beyond shopping catalogs
Pinterest

If you still get catalogs in the mail, it might be or live with a baby boomer. Not everyone is inclined to buy something they see on TV so instead, companies send these people entire catalogs of items they could probably buy online.

Of course, buying from these catalogs isn’t that convenient at all considering all the mailing and waiting you have to do just to make your purchase. But we suppose baby boomers like doing things the hard way since they’re not used to the convenience of Amazon Prime.

Baby Boomers Still Tend To Gender Everything

blue truck crayon set and pink princess crayon set
Cory Doctorow/Flickr

In baby boomer days, there was no talk of gender fluidity. If there were ever a child struggling with who they were or how they felt inside, they probably didn’t speak up about it.

Back then, if you were a girl, then you were predisposed to like girly-themed items and the same went for little boys. While generations that follow baby boomers have become a little more sensitive about things, you have to understand where your Aunt Helen was coming from when she bought your daughter a princess coloring book when your daughter clearly only likes dinosaurs.

Chain Restaurants Are Date Night Hot Spots

Applebee's restaurant exterior, neon signs.
Jeffrey Greenberg/UIG via Getty Images

After work, baby boomers enjoy treating themselves to a night out. They enjoy a nice movie or even the hottest restaurant in town. The only problem is that they think the hottest restaurant in town is their local Applebee’s.

Your Neighborhood Grill and Bar and other chain restaurants just like it are frequented by baby boomer couples. With so many better options out there these days, we can’t understand why baby boomers would rather settle for something that probably has no more than two-and-a-half stars on Yelp.

They Love To Buy Processed Foods

cans of spam in the supermarket
Nicolas Toper/Flickr

The same can’t be said of all baby boomers but many of them are entrapped in a world of processed foods. Baby boomers grew up in a time where supermarkets and food companies were trying to find out ways to make their products last longer on store shelves.

This is why a lot of food in the supermarket is chock-full of unnecessary preservatives and sugars. It’s partly why there was an obesity epidemic for generations that came after them and why healthy food is now trendy.

They Still Use Yahoo!

Yahoo! Inc. Executives, Front, Jeff Mallett, President And Coo, And Tim Koogle, Chairman And Ceo, And Broadcast.Com Inc. Executives, Rear, Mark Cuban, President And Chairman, And Todd Wagner Ceo And Vice Chairman
Getty Images

When baby boomers use the Internet, they likely have Yahoo! set-up as their homepage. Sure, they got on board when the Internet was invented but still use the thing as if it’s 1999. We can’t think of anyone who still maintains a Yahoo! email address besides our aunts and uncles and we’d be shocked to hear if anyone uses the Yahoo! search engine over Google.

But hey, at least Yahoo! is still around doing business thanks to the baby boomers who still believe it’s one of the best sites on the entire Internet.