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February 1998 Reader's Poll Results
Who would you cast in the role of Jesus and why?

Samuel L. Jackson
Why? Because he can put the fear of God into you.

John Goodman
Why? Ever read Gore Vidals book about Jesus, LIVE FROM GOLGOTHA? He portrays Jesus as a kinda heavyset guy. Whenever people see him they say things like, "I never imagined he'd look like that. He's heavier than I thought!"

Truth is stranger than fiction. Recently, I read an article that Marlon Brando was cast as God the father in a Wim Wenders film. It was produced by Spielburg. But both Wim and Marlon got so wrapped up in what they were doing (Marlon wanted to play the role naked and Wim agreed), Spielberg fired them both and hired Brad Pitt to play the roll! I'm not kidding! The film hasn't been released yet. It's called 'God', I believe. Check it out on the WWW.

Jim Carrey
Who else could portray the wacky, illogical nature of Christ's "ministry" with the energy and fervor it requires? I mean, wouldn't it be sublime to see Carrey do Christ as "The Mask"? I'd love to hear Jesus say, "Somebody stop me!"

Whoopie Goldberg
Why? Because she has played all sorts of other roles that were just as believable.

Ronald Reagan
Anyone who can joke about "the bombs will start falling in 10 minutes" has got my vote for Saviour.

Gary Oldman
Why? Because he was smolderingly intense as Dracula -- can you just see him intoning "this is my body, this is my blood?" Plus, he's got similar hair and features. And looks good with a beard.

Arnold Schwarzenegger
Why? because in this day and age we need a Christ who can really whup some ass, no more of this "blessed are the meek" crap.

Matthew McConaughey
Why?because he looked great naked with longish hair when making out with jodie foster in "Contact."

Charles Bronson
Why? Because I think Christ would be really pissed off if he came back and nobody does pissed of better than Bronson. Except maybe Brain from Pinky and the Brain.

That guy who sold John Travolta heroin in Pulp Fiction
Why? Just look at him.

Willem Dafoe
Even if he had not done "The Last Temptation of Christ", the character of Sgt. Elias in "Platoon" shows he has a lock on the lamb-to-the-slaughter-idealist-yet-kicks-butt-when-he-has-to essence that a Jesus portrayal of the 90's would have to achieve.

Karla Faye Tucker
Why? Because as her jailhouse hubby, Dana Brown, said the night she died, "Jesus Christ suffered until the end, and so did Karla Faye." Praise, Karla, she died for my sins...and hers.