N E W S - May, 1998

Bishop Gordon Beardy, the Anglican Bishop of Keewatin, organized a "Sacred Walk for Healing" last February. The money was earmarked for sexual abuse victims of former priest Ralph Rowe who molested two dozen boys and is completing a sex-year prison sentence. $50,268 was raised and $50,000 of that was spent to send Beardy's cousin to pilot training school.

Beardy has refused comment.

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An anonymous Christian tycoon donated $3.37 million dollars to mail a video of the life of Jesus to every household in Alabama. The video was produced by the Jesus Video Project, part of Campus Crusade for Christ. All of the actors are Middle Eastern with the exception of Jesus, who is played by a sandy-haired, blue-eyed British man.

Our South African corespondant sent us a newsletter from the project there. Missionaries descended on a Mozambican refuge camp only to be confronted by the camp's "witch doctors." The writer states that she "discerned that demonic opposition was building...It was obvious to us that Satan wanted the showing stopped." 93 teams are working to show the video throughout South Africa in squatter camps and in rural areas.

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Unable to accept that they made a conscious lifestyle choice to be religious churchgoers are now turning to science to prove that spirituality is genetically encoded. Using brain scanners, skin sensors, high-speed medical imaging devices, radioactive tracers, but NOT anal probes (YET), neurobiologists are searching for the centers in the body where spirituality resides.

One major study is being funded by the Templeton Foundation, Templeton as in "Templeton Funds," as in giving Charles Colson a $1 million "religious freedom" award. It is hoped that scientists will be able to discover why some people believe in the wrong God and provide them with treatment.

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Henry Nolkemper has robbed about 100 churches during his wanderings but during Easter week he decided to confess and clear his conscience. After police verified his story Nolkemper was arrested and now faces a hefty prison term.

"Can you imagine just wanting to clear your soul and all of a sudden you have 129 years to serve?" asked an incredulous Nolkemper. What was he thinking he'd get, political office and a lecture circuit?

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The Vatican has experienced an "examination of conscience" and opened the central archives on the Roman Inquisition. The Pope has recently expressed regret over the church's role in the slave trade, passivity towards the Nazi treatment of the Jews, and the censuring of Galileo. The Vatican hopes that review of documents will prove that the Roman Inquisition wasn't really all that bad.

Now if we could only get the Pope to release all the porn in the Vatican Archives.

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Aggressive Christianity | Cellmates of the Lord | Apartheid and Religion
Biting our Tonges | Lights, Camera, Blasphemy | Colson's Daily Devotional
Curiosities of the Bible: Gaining and Losing

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