Crunch Fitness in Los Angeles has begun hosting 'Gospel Moves,' a Sunday morning fitness class. Voted the best aerobic class in LA by Los Angeles magazine, the Angelinos are lining up in droves.

"I get people who have hectic schedules, but they're religious or spiritual people and they want to do something to acknowledge that. With gospel aerobics, they can fit in exercise and spirituality," says instructor Ange Buckingham.

Once a month the salon offers communion featuring grape flavored Crystal Lite and wheat-free hosts. Participants are reminded that the blood and body of Christ should be counted as one fruit and one bread exchange.

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Reverend Brendan Smyth,70, died Saturday of a heart attack in the exercise yard of Curragh Prison. Smyth had been sentenced to 12 years in prison for molesting hundreds of children in Ireland, Wales, Italy and the United States.

Smyth was shielded by both the Catholic church and the Irish government resulting in the fall of the government and a greatly weakened position for the church. When a TV documentary revealed that Smyth's abuse of children had continued unabated since the 1950s public opinion turned sharply against the church. Church attendance has dropped precipitously since Smyth was found out. The Catholic church refuses to pay compensation to any of the victims that have filed claims.

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The inspirational messages of televangelist Robert Schuller reach out and touch millions weekly but left one United Airlines flight attendant shaken, not stirred. Shuller made two requests of Khaled Elabiad; one to hang his clerical robe in the coat closet, the second to remove the cheese from his fruit plate. (Don't you just hate it when your cheese touches your grapes?)

A confrontation near the galley resulted with Elabiad claiming that Schuller shook him, leaving him unable to work. Schuller claims that he merely reached out to touch the man's arm, to calm him. AT&T sales employees Dual Macintyre and Kara Naughton, passengers on the flight, corroborated Schuller's statements.

Elabiad is suing Schuller for $5 million. After watching televangelists on TV we have no doubt that their mere touch could knock someone down. We have even seen an evangelist's touch spontaneously, dare we say miraculously, reduce the dark circles and fine lines around a supplicant's eyes and wonder if this could be the silver lining for Elabiad.

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What can only be told as a cautionary tale illustrates what can happen when ignorance goes horribly, horribly awry. In efforts to shield his daughter from the vagaries of SEX EDUCATION ultra-conservative congressman John Shmitz moved his daughter from Catholic school to Catholic school. So conservative was Schmitz that he was asked to leave the John Birch Society, as he was hurting their reputation. His career as a congressman ended when it was discovered that he had a mistress and two illegitimate children.

Schmitz's daughter, Mary Kay LeTourneau, grew up to be a school teacher, married and is the mother of four children. There is a fifth on the way, sired by one of her sixth grade students. Ms. LeTourneau, who is being divorced by her husband, still admits to having romantic feelings towards the boy. She will be sentenced for having sex with a minor August 29th.

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