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NOTE: We're not quite sure what this tract is all about but appreciate a faithful reader sending it to us from Stanley, North Dakota. Enjoy. - Miss Poppy The Chapel of the Last Resort Survival Instructions Nuclear War...Can It Be Survived? Projection for Survival Holy Con Carnage,  |
Mr. Beer Bottle Takes a Walk "How good I feel," chuckled Mr. Beer Bottle, as he stretched his funny little legs and patted his full stomach. "A nice walk out in the fresh air would be just the thing for me. I believe I shall go over and call on Mr. Milk Bottle. I'll show him I'm just as fine a fellow as he." Now, funny Mr. Beer Bottle hadn't gone far before he met Trit-trot, the horse. "Good morning," said Mr. Beer Bottle in his loudest tones, "How are you?" Trit-trot arched her brow, and lowered her fine neck to Mr. Beer Bottle's level. "I certainly am glad to see you," Mr. Beer Bottle went on. "I was just looking for some one to drink with me." To his surprise, Trit-trot wheeled suddenly on her two hind heels and galloped away, calling back as she went, "Mr. Beer Bottle, I drink only pure, crystal water from the cool spring!" Mr. Beer Bottle was much displeased at this, but only muttered to himself as he walked on.
Catching a whiff of his breath, dainty Tabby Cat turned to go. "Oh, do not go!" called Mr. Beer Bottle. "Come, let us drink together." "Indeed, no," called Tabby Cat, disappearing. "I drink only fresh, white milk. Besides, sir, your breath is terrible, terrible, sir!" Mr. Beer Bottle was, indeed, angry. No one ever had dared talk like this to him before. "I hope Mr. Milk Bottle will be at home when I get there," he thought. "Perhaps he has been talking behind my back." Going still father, Mr. Beer Bottle came upon Mr. Squeaky Pig hurrying home. "Good morning," said Mr. Beer Bottle, "you seem to be in a hurry." "I am very thirsty," grunted Squeaky Pig. "Fine! That is just what I wanted to hear! Come, have a drink with me." "Indeed not! Do you think I am Mr. Bleary-eyed Man? Thank you, I would rather drink swill from my own trough." And Squeaky Pig was gone. Mr. Beer Bottle was dreadfully displeased to be turned down in such an insulting way. As he walked on, he suddenly saw Mr. Fat Man sitting on a log, resting. "Ah," thought Mr. Beer Bottle, "here is an old friend. He will surely drink with me." "Good morning, friend," he called to Mr. Fat Man. Mr. Fat Man gave no hearty greeting in return, but instead frowned. "Do not call me friend," he shouted. "We are no longer friends. Once I thought we were friends. But you ruined my good name, made me a poor man, caused my dear wife to hate me, and made my little children go hungry. Go away, Mr. Beer Bottle, I never want to see you again." Mr. Beer Bottle was very sorrowful at having lost such a good friend as Mr. Fat Man. He thoughtfully dropped down upon a stump to rest. It wasn't far to Mr. Milk Bottle's house now. "Perhaps I am wrong," he thought. "Mr. Milk Bottle has always told me I had no place in the world. Dear me, what a problem life has become!" Suddenly Mr. Beer Bottle jumped up. "I have it," he said, "I shall go home, and this very afternoon I shall make plans to win my friends back." All the way home he chuckled to himself. "Won't Mr. Milk Bottle be surprised when he learns I am no longer Mr. Beer Bottle - because from now on I'm going to be in a different business." - From The Young Crusader, Reprinted by Permission 60 cents per 100: 35 cents per 50; 10 cents singly*
NATIONAL WCTU PUBLISHING HOUSE M13,985--4-59 Evanston, Illinois Printed in U.S.A. *NOTE: The information above was printed on the original tract and does not refer to the cost or source of tracts now.
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Soon he met Tabby, the cat. Tabby was stealing carefully through the tall grass and was indeed surprised to see Mr. Beer Bottle. For Mr. Beer Bottle did not often go out walking alone.
"Good morning," said Mr. Beer Bottle, as he lifted his cork hat.