Did you know that The Beatles isn’t spelled like “beetles” the bugs because “Beatles” has the word “beat” in it? Like a music beat? I was way too old when I found that out. What things did you find out when you were today years old?
Keep reading to find out the truth behind your favorite nursery rhymes and how you’ve been eating Tic Tacs wrong your whole life.
Flames Don’t Cast Shadows
How old were you when you found out that flames don’t have shadows? It makes sense when you think about it. Shadows happen when a solid object blocks the light.
A flame is light, so it’s not blocking any light. I guess deep down I understood this, but I never really saw it play out.
The Straw Hole Is The Dot Of The "I"
Well, I was definitely today years old when I realized the hole of a Capri Sun pouch is the dot of the "I." That’s some clever product design.
Is it clever if nobody noticed it though? I think it’s still clever. It took me years to appreciate it, but I appreciate it now.
Same Tune, Different Song
Apparently, when they were writing kids’ songs back in the day, they only really had one tune. It’s what’s called being lazy.
I realized this a long time ago, though. That probably makes me smarter than you. I’m really good at my ABC’s, just saying.
I Was Today Years Old When I Realized That Dogs Have Butts
I mean, I always knew that dogs had butts, but I didn’t know that they had little butt cheeks and a little butt crack. There’s an actual booty under all of that fur.
This dog looks pretty embarrassed about his booty being out in the open.
Pizza Tables Keep The Box From Touching The Pizza
And all this time I thought they were just for decoration. My brother and I used to fight over these when we were younger.
I’m not sure why. They aren’t very cool or useful. They did keep our pizzas from getting smushed, though. Good job, pizza tables.
Tag, You’re It
Well, I was definitely today years old when I found that out. I thought tag was just a random word with no particular meaning.
You know, I’m not totally sure if I buy this one. It would be cool if it were true, I just can’t find any corroborating evidence.
Um, Did People Seriously Not Know This?
Her first name is a city and her last name rhymes with Hilton. How did people not make this connection? Her father owns a hotel, she has a little dog, and she wears a lot of pink.
I thought this one was obvious. I guess the kids watching Suite Life of Zack and Cody may not have known who Paris Hilton is.
That Seems Kind Of Mean
What was his actual name then? I’m one hundred percent sure that a running gag like this wouldn’t fly on television today. It seems a bit racially insensitive if you ask me.
But then again, so were the ’70s, and That ’70s Show was a show about the ’70s…
So That’s What Those Holes Are For
I just realized that the hole in the pot handle is made for holding your messy cooking spoons. I guess you could also use it to hang up your pots.
It’s weird that I’ve actually never used that little hole even though it has so many uses.
Holy Smokes, Me Too
I thought it was just because square rhymes with there. Also because squares are not a great shape for a person to be. Everyone wants an hourglass figure. Nobody wants to look like a square.
This make so much more sense. Maybe I’ll actually start using this phrase now.
Gatorade Is Too Smart For Us
I was today years old when I found out that the bottom of a Gatorade Frost bottle is made to hold the cap. Gatorade is back at it again with the clever product design. Gatorade and Capri Sun are in it to win it.
Now I kind of want a Gatorade Frost. Their plan is working.
The Statue Of Liberty Wasn’t Always Green
How old were you when you found out the Statue of Liberty was originally brown? The Statue of Liberty is made out of copper, which means that originally, it was the same color as a penny. Over time, copper oxidizes and becomes green.
I think I like her better in green.
Slang Is Actually Slang
If slang is short for "short language," then the word slang itself is slang because it’s shortened language. That’s the most meta thing I’ve ever heard.
You learn something new every day, I guess. Next you’re going to tell me that "sloth" is short for "slow thing."
Grocery Stores Think Of Everything
My life just got marginally easier now that I know about these random hooks on the back of grocery carts. Say goodbye to the days of only putting bags inside the cart.
Now they can go outside the cart too. Oh, happy day. Oh, blessed day.
You’ve Been Eating Tic Tacs Wrong Your Whole Life
Did you know that the little oval space in the lid of a Tic Tac box is there so you can get a single Tic Tac out of the box without struggling?
I was today years old when I found that out. Sometimes you want more than one Tic Tac though…
Well Now I’m Just Sad
Oh my goodness. Now I’m questioning everything about my childhood. What happened to Mary’s lamb? Is he ok? What about Ba Ba Black Sheep? He must be cold…
I think this is enough to seriously make me consider becoming a vegan. The world just isn’t nice to pigs who cry "wee wee wee" all the way home.
The Krusty Krab Is A Lobster Trap
Well, that’s ironic. Maybe it’s a metaphor for how Mr. Krabs is trapped by his own greed. Although, he is a crab. He’s not a lobster. He does have customers who are lobsters though.
Sometimes I can’t follow this show’s logic. How can there be a beach underwater?
Speaking Of Spongebob…
The houses in Spongebob Squarepants are car mufflers that have been thrown into the ocean. Pollution much?
Spongebob lives in a pineapple though. I wonder who threw that into the ocean? Maybe it just fell off a pineapple tree and landed in Bikini Bottom.
All The Kings Horses And All The Kings Men
Humpty Dumpty is an egg i every drawing I’ve ever seen of the nursery rhyme, but nowhere in the rhyme does it mention him being an egg.
He was probably just a regular guy who fell off of a wall and died. That’s pretty unfortunate.
The Hidden Arrow In The FedEx Logo
Well, that’s probably the smartest graphic design I’ve ever seen. I wonder if they called the company FedEx just so they could pull this off. What came first, the name or the arrow?
I need to know the answer to this very important question.