You know all about Elf on the Shelf, right? It's the adorable little toy elf that "keeps an eye" on children and reports on their behavior each day. In return for the favor of child monitoring, parents have to move the elf to clever new locations and pose it in silly positions every night. This has become a beloved holiday tradition for lots of families across the globe. But if you've grown tired of the Elf on the Shelf, you'll want to check out these hilarious alternatives. We're not sure if your kids will be fans of these "alternate elves" but at least reading this will give you a break from worrying about where you're going to put your family's elf tonight.
A Monster In The Backyard?
This one's pretty easy -- it's Shrek on a Deck! The beloved green ogre's name rhymes perfectly with "deck" so this one makes perfect sense. There are lots of variations of Shrek on a Deck around the internet, but we liked this one best.
Another variation shows Shrek sitting on top of a deck of cards... which is another clever direction to take this joke in. For future reference, we also would have accepted check, neck, wreck, or speck.
Little Surfer Girl
Oh, lord, now it's Lorde on the Board. And she decided to bring two of her Grammy awards along for the ride. Who even knew that she could surf? Both of these awards are from her 2014 smash hit song "Royals," one for Song of the Year and the other for Best Pop Solo Performance. Lorde has been nominated for three other Grammys as well.
We think this Elf on the Shelf pun is a great tribute to the multi-talented musician.
This one is too ridiculous not to share. RuPaul on a Uhaul... absolutely perfect. In a reference to the drag queen's television show RuPaul's Drag Race, one clever Redditor added this caption to the meme.
"Your performance in the Uhaul challenge was moving, and your presentation on the runway showed you think outside the box. You're safe." Another added, "Your performance in the moving van challenge really took us places."
That Cake Looks Delicious
Oh hey, Drake. We see you there, perched on top of a delicious cake. One woman in New Orleans is a huge fan of this meme. Joy Wilson runs a bakery named Joy the Baker, and she calls the Drake on Cake thing her "passion project."
She bakes cakes and decorates them with lyrics from Drake's music. As she says, "Drake lyrics lend themselves very well to cake messages." You can follow Joy on Instagram at @drakeoncake if you're equally obsessed.
Harry Potter Fans, Rejoice
When it comes to silly memes like this one, you just have to remember that "if it rhymes it rides." This particular photo is a good example of the rule, because it's just so far out there. Snape on a Grape... absolutely bizarre but inexplicably hilarious at the same time.
The fact that the Photoshop quality is so terrible on this one somehow makes it that much funnier. It almost makes us think that we could have come up with something this good.
Picture Your Face On A Bottle Of Newman's Own
Now, just who is this lovely lady peering out from a bottle of Newman's Own Two Thousand Island flavored salad dressing? It's certainly not Paul Newman, whose face is usually featured on these bottles.
Nope, it's none other than actress Debra Messing. Get it? Messing on the Dressing. We just wonder if any bottles that were sold with her face on them would count toward the Newman's Own Foundation "100% of Profits to Charity" promise.
He Was Known As "The Pelvis" For A Reason
You've heard of Elf on the Shelf. Now prepare yourself for... Elvis on the Pelvis! In June of 1956, Elvis Presley performed on The Milton Berle Show. After the hip-gyrating dance he did, he was forever known as "Elvis the Pelvis."
As Elvis once said of performing, "my manager told me they was hollerin' because I was wigglin’ my legs … And so I went back out for an encore and I did a little more. And the more I did, the wilder they went." This Elvis on the Pelvis joke is a perfect (and hilarious) tribute to the King of Rock and Roll and the legacy he left behind.
Look Up In The Sky!
For several years, Pope Soap on a Rope has been available for sale in novelty shops around the world. The packaging promised that using the soap would "wash away your sins." Pope on a Rope is also an album put out by a band called the Meatmen.
Well now, the Pontiff is an Elf on the Shelf meme too: Pope on the Rope. He appears to be walking a tightrope across a deep gorge. Let's hope the Pope has excellent balance!
Here we have Skello in the Jell-O. He's not here to ruin your holiday feast, he just wanted to spice things up a little bit. This meme is especially appropriate since Jell-O is made from bones.
According to LiveScience, "Jell-O is a sweetened gelatin product made by boiling the bones and hides of animals." You know what, we think we might pass on Jell-O next time it's offered. But we still like this Elf on the Shelf parody.
Clever, This Is
We're sure that Yoda, the legendary Jedi Master, would be tickled pink by this parody. Yoda on Soda is a pretty cute version of Elf on the Shelf.
Apparently, rhyming Yoda with soda isn't a new thing, because there are actually lots of recipes online for a drink called "Yoda Soda." Most variations of it contain a green juice of some sort, mixed with Sprite or Fresca or something similar. Would you try some?
Hey Kids, It's Snoop!
We're not entirely sure whether this is a real product that you can buy, but if it isn't it should be. When this Snoop on the Stoop meme hit Reddit, people freaked out and several said they'd buy this in a heartbeat.
This Snoop Dogg version of Elf on the Shelf even comes with a book called Roll Up.. It's Snoop on the Stoop: A Hood Tradition. Also included is a sample of the rapper's favorite "vegetable."
It'll Clean All Your Playground Equipment
2018 was a busy year for Tide detergent appearing in the news. First came the "Eating Tide Pod Challenge," the dangerous and irresponsible trend where people videoed themselves pretending to eat the tasty-looking detergent capsules.
The Tide version of Elf on the Shelf is a lot funnier. "Tide on the Slide" is cute and doesn't encourage impressionable children to try and eat something lethal. And this is one you could actually set up at home, if you really wanted to for some reason.
Pony On Bologna
There are entire Reddit threads devoted to discussions about how weird it is that these two words rhyme. But rhyme they do, and that makes us happy. Because Pony on Bologna might just be our favorite parody of Elf on the Shelf yet.
One confused Redditor wrote, "The preferred spelling here IS baloney because it matches the pronunciation, but bologna is still said the same way. I don't get English sometimes..." Don't worry, you're not alone.
Who's That On Your Socks?
Why, it's Barack! Former President Barack Obama looks great on this pair of tall and patriotically-colored tube socks. This also happens to be one of the only items on our Elf on the Shelf list that could become an actual product.
During the holidays in 2013, the Obama family was photographed with several adorable children who were dressed as elves... which might be the closest we ever get to seeing Mr. Obama with an Elf on the Shelf doll.
An Unlikely Pairing
If you ever thought there wasn't a good word to rhyme with Luigi, you were dead wrong. Here's proof: Luigi on a Squeegee. In case you don't recognize the little guy, it's Nintendo's fictional video game character. He's the brother and sidekick of Mario, Nintendo's mascot.
Fun fact... there are a few cleaning companies who have capitalized on this clever rhyme. Luigi's Squeegee is a business in Arizona and Squeegee Luigi is located in California. Cute!
Parton On The Spartan
Well, this isn't an image you see every day. It's the legendary singer Dolly Parton, sitting right on the shoulder of Gerard Butler as a Spartan in the 2006 war movie. Since Dolly is taking the role of "elf" here, we guess she's the one who watches over us all day and reports our behavior later.
Whoever created this parody image clearly knows their way around Photoshop, as this one looks a lot more professional than most of the others. Dolly looks downright natural on that man's bare shoulder.
A Game Of Cat And Mouse
If this one takes you a minute to figure out, that's OK. It did for us, too. The correct answer is Jerry on a Dictionary. Tom's in the picture but not a part of the meme, which completely threw us off.
This certainly isn't the funniest Elf on the Shelf parody, but you have to give credit for the effort anyway. After all, a little laugh is better than no laugh at all!
Pence On A Fence
There are lots of political directions we could take with this one, but that's just not our style. It's just Pence on a Fence.
We were recently looking back through Vice President Mike Pence's Twitter feed and found this odd fence-related post from 2015. "There's an old saying that when you see a box turtle on a fencepost you know one thing for sure, he didn’t get there on his own." Can't say we've ever heard that one...
Pay Attention, Eleven
The character Eleven from Stranger Things would surely get a kick out of this Elf on the Shelf parody (since she loves Eggo waffles so much). Here you go, Eleven: Lego on the Eggo.
This meme works on a couple of different levels, since "L'Eggo My Eggo" has been the waffle company's catchphrase for a long time. And Eggo actually sold stackable waffles resembling LEGO bricks for a while in 2007. Those waffles' motto was "Toast, Break, and Build."
Mensch On A Bench
Neal Hoffman, a former Hasbro toy executive, took the Elf on the Shelf theme and ran with it, creating what's essentially the Jewish equivalent of the Christmas book. He appeared on Shark Tank to promote "Moshe the Mensch" and made nearly a million dollars within a month.
The brand has now expanded to include its own hot cocoa, a mobile phone app, plush menorahs and dreidels, more characters, a website, and an upcoming Mensch on the Bench cartoon.