People Who Are Making Things Way More Difficult Than They Need To Be
Desperate Times Call For Desperate Measures

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Spam is never the right choice no matter how broke you are. A can cost more than $2.00, and you could buy a double cheeseburger for that price.
If you do opt for the Spam though, take it down to the communal microwave and zap it until it’s cooked. It’s not worth this amount of trouble.