Cooking Fails To Make You Feel Better About Your Skills In The Kitchen
Sometimes, no matter how hard we try, no matter how closely we follow the instructions, no matter how long it takes us, the recipe just turns out wrong. Maybe you realize afterward that you forgot an ingredient, or you set the oven to the wrong temperature. Or maybe you have absolutely no idea what happened but you know something is definitely wrong.
These people may not know where they went wrong but the reason doesn’t even matter because the finished product is all we care about. There’s a reason we’re calling these cooking fails and not cooking successes.
Pay A Professional
When will parents learn that not everyone is destined to be a professional cake decorator? Obviously, you want to impress your kid and all their friends (and their parents, let’s be honest) with some extravagant cake. But then you quickly learn they’re actually really hard to make.
If your child desperately wants that space-themed birthday party with an astronaut shaped cake, spare yourself the pain and embarrassment and just order one from a bakery.
We’re not sure what exactly they were cooking that would make something explode like this. Maybe jiffy pop in a pressure cooker? Or maybe they tossed some dynamite in there?
How do you even describe this situation to the salesman when you try to exchange the cooker for a refund? Good luck getting a refund because you clearly just need a lesson on how to properly use a pressure cooker. You should probably just show them this picture and that would be enough to prove to them that the product was defective.
This looks like someone was recreating the scene from The Office with Kevin and his chili. But based on the look on this woman’s face, that wasn’t what was happening here.
The look of pure defeat also tells us this may not have been the first time this happened. At the very least it’s not the first time her cooking didn’t turn out exactly as she had hoped. Nice of whoever took this picture to document it for her for next time, right? So thoughtful.
What Was This Even Supposed To Be?
This looks like something straight out of The Conjuring or Paranormal Activity. The real question is why was someone trying to make a baby out of meatloaf in the first place? This is something that should have never existed.
Apparently, this isn’t an uncommon thing. We’ve also a similarly deformed demon baby who was made out of spinach. PSA: please stop making food in the shape of a baby. It never turns out the way you want it to.
Don’t Get Bent Out Of Shape
The person behind this food fail thought their baking dish was glass but quickly learned when they took it out of the oven that they had made a grave mistake.
At least with this one, you might still be able to eat the middle of whatever dish this was. The edges and the bottom are untouchable thanks to a whole bunch of chemicals that have leaked in from the plastic, but if the food is yummy enough that may be a risk you’re willing to take!
A Nuclear Reaction
This is the risky part about the “place the pizza directly on the middle rack” instruction. Did you forget to set the timer? Nuclear explosion. Did you set the oven too hot? Atomic bomb-worthy smoke cloud made of pizza.
One smart Reddit user suggested that next time, always put a second pizza directly below the top one so that if you didn’t learn your lesson and it happens for a second time, you’ll at least catch the toppings.
She Tried Her Best
At least this person isn’t trying to pretend that these cookies are good at all. They fully admit how bad they are. Sometimes you just need to admit defeat and move on in order to heal.
The user admitted she used far too much flour than she was supposed to, as well as a chocolate bar that was 85% cocoa so it was more than a little dry. That still doesn’t explain the slightly-pink tint to the cookies. It’s the thought that counts right?
“My friend’s husband wanted to make Gingerbread cookies for his kid…he didn’t know he was supposed to remove the cookie cutters before baking!”
It’s one of those things that people would just assume you know to do. So naturally, no packaging is ever going to specify “remove cookie cutters after use” because why would anyone bake metal cookie cutters. These are the type of people who prove why companies need to label the weirdest things.
The question we’re all wondering is why does it have teeth? Who thought that giving this creature human-like teeth was a good idea? There was no reason for this horrifying addition.
The user who shared this photo of a cake said that it apparently made one of the kids at the party cry because it was so ugly. We feel you kid. It was apparently supposed to be a hedgehog or a porcupine, but something went horribly wrong.
There Goes The Security Deposit…
A picture says a thousand words but this picture raises a thousand questions. There is so much happening we don’t even know where to start.
First of all, why are there so many pans on this stove? Also, what were you cooking that went so horribly wrong? What happened that caused the stove’s hood fan to be blown off? And then the age-old question that mom is going to ask…how are you going to clean it up?
This feels like one of those recipes that even if it wasn’t clearly burned, it probably wouldn’t have been very good in the first place. Whoever came up with the recipe idea for a tray of s’mores made out of marshmallow Peeps has a serious sweet tooth.
It just doesn’t seem like a dish that would be easy to devour. Do you dip graham crackers in it or do you go straight for a spoon? We’re intrigued by the idea but not enough to actually give it a try.
It Was His First Time, Okay?
“My 21-year-old boyfriend made his first pot of coffee this morning.” We would cut him some slack if he was trying a new recipe or cooking anything with difficult, but does it count as trying a new recipe if it’s just coffee? No, it doesn’t.
There are a lot of things that can go wrong with this and it looks like he did all of them. He obviously didn’t put the lid on all the way, or line the pot up with the only spot that it actually fits, and definitely overfilled the coffee grinds.
Time For Takeout
When will people learn that you can’t put an ice-cold glass baking dish into a preheated oven? “Sometimes I’m amazing and sometimes I am not. Today we are going out for dinner… There are no prizes for guessing why,” wrote one mom on Instagram.
At least you won’t have to do the dishes after you’re done eating because you’re now going out for dinner! Maybe that was this mom’s plan all along.
This is one of those Pinterest trends that people convince themselves that anyone can make, but then it turns out to be a lot harder than you realize.
If you look on Instagram you’ll quickly realize that most people who try to make cookie bowls end up with something that looks like this. It never actually looks like something that came off of a dessert show on the Food Network. There’s must be a secret to making these, but we don’t know what it is.
Melting The Microwave Instead Of The Chocolate
Why would you put a metal top in the microwave and think that it was going to turn out properly? If you’ve ever microwaved something with metal on it by accident you know that there’s a deafening noise that happens very shortly after you hit ‘start’ so we’re curious how long it took this woman to hit ‘stop’ because that’s some serious damage.
We get that all you wanted was some warmed up chocolate, but may we introduce you to a thing called a double-boiler?
Don’t Judge A Book By Its Burnt Outsides
You’re probably looking at this picture trying to figure out what exactly it is you’re looking at. Are you ready? It’s apparently loaves of cheese bread.
According to the Instagram post, we should try not to “judge the taste from its look” because it’s apparently a yummy smoked ham and cheese bread. It’s impressive that anyone was even willing to try this creation. If this were a restaurant you could just call it blackened cajun bread and call it a day…but it’s not.
Life Hack Gone Wrong
You know that life hack that you always see on Instagram, Pinterest, and Twitter that if you put a wooden spoon flat across a pot, it won’t boil over? Turns out this lifehack is a lie, or at least it’s not always effective, considering the literal fire that’s started beneath this person’s pot.
People on Reddit seemed to think that if you fill a pot “too much” then this hack won’t be effective, but how much is too much?
Maybe They Were Trying To Make Something New?
Pasta is one of those dishes that everyone can cook. It’s simple, easy to learn, so basic you can’t screw it up…unless you’re this person.
“Thought I was getting better at cooking… Turns out I can’t even be trusted with pasta” wrote Ben on Twitter when he shared the image of his pasta in the shape of a rice cake. We’re not even going to pretend that this is still edible. Sorry Ben, no lunch for you.
Always Check Your Burners
What do you think she noticed first – the smell of burning plastic or the smoke that was undoubtedly coming off the cutting board? Remember folks, always turn off your burners after you’re finished using them, and give them time to cool down before you set anything on top of them.
At least this one didn’t actually harm the food. Your pasta remains unscathed but your whole kitchen has to smell terrible for a little while. We’re fine with the trade-off.
One Reddit user posted this picture with the caption “how I know my girlfriend was cooking today.” This is actually genius, as long as you remember to put it back up at the end of the day.
If you know you’re not a good cook (or if you know your significant other isn’t) just take that pesky smoke detector down so that the alarm doesn’t bother you. Or better yet, don’t leave your food unattended, then it won’t burn!