Things That Could Only Happen In Today’s America Because The Future Is Very Clearly Now
Baby Boomers and Generation X have done their fair share of ruining things. But any headline will tell you the new stars of the show are Millennials and Generation Z. These two younger generations know the future is in their hands, and they have honestly done a lot of positive things to try and make the future bright.
But in between all the positive things, Millennials and Gen Z do a lot of things that would make anyone shake their head. Seriously. Social media has become so dominant that it's basically a new class system. Step aside, old people. You may have crashed the economy, but it's time for the 35 and under crowd to make us collectively groan. These things could definitely only happen in today's America.
This Is How We Teach Kids About WW1 Now?
It seems like the only way to keep a high school student's attention is if you make it about social media. I'm not sure tweeting about WW1 is a good idea though.
"Narrowly avoided dying from #TRENCHFOOT last week, but just found out we're headed to Passchendaele soon. Stoked to see Belgium. Yeet!"
I'll Take A Bag Of The #NomNomNoms
I can't decide if the Millennial that named these trail mixes deserves a raise, or should be fired. In all seriousness, the names tell you nothing about what's in the trail mix, so it looks like you're flying blind.
I can't decide between the #NomNomNom and the Treat Yourselfie mix.
He's A Gen Z Icon
Snowboarders of all generations have generally known to be a chill, but Red Gerard may have been too relaxed when he won his first Olympic gold medal. Even he can't believe he managed to pull this one off. And you can't even say Gen Z is entitled, because no Baby Boomer could land a triple chicken salad.
Thanks, Tinder, For Making Relationships Even More Awkward
I'm sure dating was always awkward. Just imagine having to call someone to ask them on a date and have their father pick up because it's the only landline in the house.
But Tinder and other dating apps have made it more simple, yet somehow it's even more cringey to date. This Valentine's card basically sums up how Millennials and Gen Z approach relationships.
Can You Really Enter Adulthood If You Haven't Been In A Twitter Feud Yet?
All 21st birthday cakes are lame in comparison to this one. Yes, Azalea Banks probably holds the record for Twitter fights, but that doesn't take away from how impressive this is.
For my 21st, I had a storebought cupcake and blacked out. This guy's 21st is like a brush with fame.
Professionalism Is Dead
The job market isn't exactly ideal for the under-35 crowd. Unless you're in a STEM field or a coal miner, we don't have many opportunities. That's why so many of us end up working in grocery stores. This cover letter may be as inappropriate as it gets, but if Jeromy gets the job done, then cut him some slack.
Who Is Paying For This?
Welcome to America. We're tired of the 1% controlling everything. There's a new class system in town, and it's based on how many followers you have.
No Wall Street banker would be able to cop a photo with this mural. They may be filthy rich, but they have zero street cred.
The Only Way To Get A Millennial To Buy A House
We're not naming names (or generations) but SOMEONE has made it a little difficult for Millennials to buy a house. Whatever real estate agent put this house up for sale knows that food is more important than a front yard with a white picket fence.
I'm willing to spend all my savings on a house now that I know tacos are involved.
This Sign Would Make No Sense Two Years Ago
If I walked past this sign in 2016, I would think the person who made it was on a cocktail of drugs. Fast-forward two years later and it makes too much sense. I'd congratulate the executives at the pizza roll company for this sign, but you know it was the 22-year-old unpaid intern that thought of it.
Even Behind Bars, The #Foodstagram Community Stays Strong
We've all seen dinner dates, lunch meetings, and Sunday brunch get interrupted by the one person who needs to take photos of their food for Instagram. But have you ever seen a #Foodstagram photo from prison?
This is the kind of dedication that we all need to have. This inmate lives and dies by the hashtag.
If You Want To Change Politics, You Have To Join In
YouTuber Elijah Daniel spent two days calling towns to see if he could become mayor, and the town of Hell, Michigan, kindly obliged.
In his first (and only) decree, he said: "Growing up, I was always told that homosexuals would go to Hell, now the heterosexuals are trying to take this from us too." He got impeached, but it's about the journey, right?
We Don't Want To Offend Anyone Who Identifies As A Piece Of Chocolate
And any piece of chocolate is free to practice whatever religion they please, so we don't want to risk saying "Merry Christmas." This chocolate shop got as PC as possible, but they are targetting the wrong crowd. Most people 35 and under can't afford gourmet chocolates. What a rookie mistake.
Parents With Full Sleeves Are Killing The Coloring Book Industry
All the 28-year-olds with full sleeves who have finally become parents are now a walking, talking, coloring book.
There are a few Boomers and Gen Xers covered in tattoos, but not to the same degree as Millennials. People used to judge tatted-up parents, but this photo proves that tattooed parents are the same as anyone else.
One Generation To Rule Them All
Only a generation that grew up with the Internet would have to rely on Amazon's Alexa to tell them when to feed the baby. Unfortunately, this Alexa got her wires crossed and instructed the parents to "defeat the baby."
Maybe it's a mistake, or maybe is a warning that the next generation will be even worse than the current one.
How Did We Let Smart Home Devices Get This Far?
Speaking on Amazon's Alexa, how has this happened? Millennials and Gen Z grew up with the threat of robots. First, they take away our jobs and then we just let them into our homes to control everything from the lights to the TV. If the smart home devices all rise up and take over, we only have ourselves to blame.
The photo coming up is hanging on a Boomer's wall, but it is as Millennial as it gets.
Art Is Everywhere When You're A Hipster Millennial
Some people think the Millennial hipsters with the beards who crochet on their lunch break and visit art galleries for fun are a little too extra, and they're not entirely wrong.
Someone put their glasses on the floor of an art studio, and people actually believed it was supposed to be an exhibit. We're a gullible generation.
Logan Paul Is The Embodiment Of The Worst Of This Generation
This headline sums up how ridiculous YouTube culture and social media presence is. For all anyone knows, Logan Paul could be a nice guy. But everyone knows him as the guy who will do anything for a view or a "like."
House rules: if it involves hurting people or animals, it's not worth the extra hundred followers.
We Still Know How To Capture Beautiful Family Memories
This is one aunt's favorite photo of her nephews. She loves it so much that it's framed and hanging on a wall. Before this photo, she probably had three separate photos of each guy hanging out on his phone alone in the corner.
Whoever said technology can't bring us together?
Uber Is Doing Everything Possible To Keep Us From Drinking And Driving
Millennials have killed the dine-in industry, but we've sprouted a bunch of new ones. Delivering pizza is so last generation. Uber Eats has made it easy for us to get cheap food at a great price, wherever we are.
Why should we stop at food when we can expand our horizons and have alcohol delivered too?
Paying For Affection Is Better Than Any Strip Club
Paying for sex and hiring women based on their bodies is out. Paying for comfort and affection in a purely platonic form is in.
A cuddling service is what happens when you combine a permanently lonely generation with a greater interest in actually respecting women's bodies (for once).
