Oh, the office fridge. Such a mystical and dark place. Full of questions, weird smells that you can never pinpoint, and years-old creamer that no one can seem to muster up the courage to throw away. This appliance never fails to amaze us.
There's nothing quite like opening a fridge, only to see witty and sarcastic notes, bougie water displays, and rotting fruits. It goes to show that people who work in an office have a lot of feelings. Nothing says "mine" like subtle threats and destroyed food. These photos are going to make you glad you bring non-refrigerated sandwiches to work.
Counting The Rice Must Have Taken A Hot Minute
Let's start with the obvious. Can we please meet the person who actually had the time and energy to count out every single grain of rice in their stir fry? 4,311 is way too specific for them to not have gone through the motion.
That being said, are they planning on recounting before eating? Then if grains are missing how are they going to go about tracking down the perpetrator responsible for such a theft? The shrimp makes sense since it's easy enough to count and then recount. That doesn't make this person any less cray-cray if you catch our drift.
The Force Is Strong With This Lunch
To whoever is the owner of this marvelous Chewbacca lunchbox, we thank you. No one in their right mind would question why a Wookiee lunch pail was in the fridge at an office -- not. At first glance, it looks like someone put an animal next to the Pepsi. Maybe the furball is addicted to soda, who knows.
Regardless, there should definitely be a PSA sent around the office so no one screams and calls animal control. It would be a very weird conversation to have with them, "oh, sorry, yea, that's just my Wookiee lunchbox." May the force be with this office fridge.
Attack Of The Yogurt
First off, who forgets that they brought in a few yogurts and put them in the communal fridge, and then leaves them there for a few weeks?! At least a co-worker was nice enough to leave a note. Although, it would have been better if they put the toxic bacteria into a trash can. But who are we to say.
Is anyone willing to bet the person who left the containers is the one who told everyone to run for their lives? The snarkiness almost makes it seem more like a college dorm fridge. But there's food in it, so there goes that idea.
Safe To Say This Isn't Edible Anymore
Who said Edible Arrangements had to actually be edible? A little dried fruit never hurt anyone! Unless that fruit has been sitting in an office fridge for weeks unchecked. And is that lettuce? Do these types of arrangements even come with lettuce, or did those leafy greens spring out of the plastic sticks like daisies?
The thing is people, at least eat all of the chocolate-covered strawberries before they go to waste! It's almost sacrilege to toss those things into the trash. Shame on you! There are people more than willing to eat that fruit. But like only the chocolate ones.
Nothing Like Road Kill In A Brown Bag
Hey, at least they were nice enough to label the brown bag so no innocent eyes have to see the dead peace bird. Then again, why is it in the office fridge to begin with? There are literally zero reasons for a dead anything to be in the fridge!
Can people even eat dove? Like can we physically digest the bird without dying? It just reminds us of the Always Sunny in Philadelphia episode where Frank eats a crow. It did not end well for him! Sir or madame, for once, take a lesson from Frank: do not eat the bird!
Sad Fruit In A Sad Office Fridge
The pears are sad because you don't want them! You'd be a sad pear too if someone told others to feel free to steal you, Mac and Trudy. Just one question though. How does a pear become sad? Is it because they're sour? Maybe the fruit just isn't ripe yet and you're too impatient to wait?
At least they put a sign on the sad pears. Nothing says a good office fridge like free food. Even if the food is sad. Hopefully, that doesn't mean that whoever eats the pear becomes a sad human pear. These are the questions that keep us up at night.
Don't Steal From Someone Who Owns Lions
So, lions. Are they pets of the owner of the food in the office fridge? If so, how in the world was he able to obtain two white tigers? We didn't even know that was possible is you're not Mike Tyson and the animal in question was a tiger.
The typography is also a bit alarming. Who hurt you that you have to, in all caps, tell people that your food doesn't belong to them. Remind us never to take food from this person, we don't want to be yelled at and then have lions come at us. A mediocre lunch is not worth it!
Lobster = Just Pretentious Enough
Bringing a lobster for lunch at work and not wrapping it, so people see that you bought a lobster is just pretentious enough. Is this not a human resources issue? What if there are hardcore animal rights activists in the office? You can't have a pre-boiled lobster chilling in the communal fridge!
Also, did the person just walk up to the office with a lobster in their hands? Because there is no way they went through the trouble of bringing a bowl from home to the office for the sole purpose of giving the lobster a place to hang out until lunchtime. Then again, they brought lobster. So it's possible.
Someone Spends Way Too Much Time On Pinterest
Alright, tell whoever is taking up room in the office fridge with ten different variations of fresh fruit water to get off Pinterest. That, and there is no reason to go out and buy fancy VOSS water when there is most likely a tap or a water jug in the office.
People literally buy those things solely because the bottle is glass and they "look cool." Nice try VOSS people, we're not falling for it. And what's with the bubbly hiding in the back? Is the office celebrating its rainbow water? Maybe we can get behind that.
Only The Necessities Will Stay
There are few things that every office fridge should have, three of those things being creams and milk for coffee, and beer, because when the going gets tough people may need booze. At least David was nice enough to let everyone know that he was going to go all spring cleaning crazy on the fridge.
We also thoroughly approve of the bold, bright red marker stating the things that will not be thrown away. You know that there was probably someone in the office that saw the notice but failed to read the last line. Of which didn't include the beer! Time to indulge.
There Is No Way She Is Getting Paid Enough
This lady is a brave soul, going into that fridge without any hand protection. We also love how she managed to find a waterproof crossing guard outfit and a face mask but no gloves. Where does one even find that jacket and pant combination, unless you work at a school, maybe?
She looks so hesitant about diving in that it makes us really wonder what could possibly be in that disorganized abyss the office calls a fridge. We're guessing at least five moldy containers, lots of rotten fruit, and maybe a jar or two of expired condiments. On second thought, just throw the whole fridge out.
The Co-Worker Clap Back
Pettiness obviously does not lessen with age. This co-worker did the ultimate clap back, spitting in the salad dressing so the thief would stop using it! Well, that defensive maneuver came back to slap them in the face. Obviously, this instance calls for the age-old phrase "sharing is caring."
It's also light dressing. If you're going to put a dressing on a salad, or anything for that matter, just make it normal dressing. There isn't much of a calorie difference and the taste is so much better. You know it, we know it, the whole world knows it. So stop spitting in dressings, share, and get the actual stuff.
Humpty Dumpty Got A Girlfriend He's Not too Sure About
These eggs have very different personalities. That is if eggs had personalities. The egg on the left clearly is not sure about his co-egg on the right. Like why did she get eyelashes and he just got a mean mug expression?
That being said, who takes the time out of their morning to draw actual faces on their hard-boiled eggs? Also, if it's morning, wouldn't you be eating said eggs instead of drawing on them? I guess we can take one out of Fault In Our Stars: "How did scrambled eggs get stuck with breakfast exclusivity?" We won't discriminate against the eggs. Maybe they're saving them for lunch.
Styrofoam Verse Metal
We get not wanting to share your 36 eggs with people. You need your protein! But we're going to go out on a limb here and tell you that in a battle between styrofoam and metal, styrofoam is going to break every single time. Give that deadbolt a little tug and boom, the eggs are free and chaos reigns.
The effort gets a solid A+ though. This person definitely thought long and hard about how they were going to keep their eggs safe from any unwanted co-workers looking to make a quick scramble. Pro tip: if you're this concerned, eat at home.
Someone Is Clearly Over Protective Of This Specific Milk Brand
Not one, not two, but three gallons of milk. All of which have been previously opened, mind you. They're also the same brand, so either this person has a huge milk addiction, or the people working in this office need to talk to one another and share the milk.
Also, where in the world did they find wrought iron rods to stick through the plastic tubs? And who thinks of these things? Technically, all we would have to do to get to the milk is cut a larger hole and slide the rod through. We might not be engineers, but how did they not think of that?
It's A Mineral Not A Rock
We really hope we're not the only ones shaking our heads at this office fridge. If they weren't going for that purple fridge glow, then we're not sure why on Earth there would be a purple rock sitting on the shelf next to the V8. Sorry, mineral, not a rock.
You'd think we'd know that this is a mineral after all of the Breaking Bad we've watched. Yes, after looking up the mineral, it has been concluded that it could possibly be an Amethyst.
It Must Be Jessica's Water
Look, Jessica, we get it, you're a selfish person and want the entire crisper drawer to yourself. You do work in an office, there are other people that might want to utilize that drawer. A non-selfish person might leave the water at their desk and only put one or two in the fridge at a time.
Oh, and thank you for making sure we understood that it is, in fact, your water. We were utterly confused. We actually thought it was Karen's, but we finally came to the realization that it is yours after reading the third post-it note.
Pasta-La Vista, Baby
Whoever wrote this note, two things. One, thank you for giving people a heads up that the pasta will go everywhere if the pan is not held from the bottom. And two, your dad called, he wants his bad dad-joke pun back.
At least the pasta pun will give workers a bit of comic relief throughout the day. And who wouldn't go and open the fridge? Free leftovers are pretty much crack to people in the workforce. It doesn't matter if it's 30 pounds of pasta, it will be eaten within 24 hours or they will get full trying.
Free Cheese Is The Best Cheese
Nothing says office fridge quite like a packet of free American sliced cheese. People are just so generous! But they couldn't splurge on some nicer cheese? Maybe some real cheese that isn't processed and then individually wrapped in plastic? The only reason to ever buy this cheese is if you're feeling like an old-school grilled cheese sandwich.
So, if there's no free bread lying around this is just a tease. Not to say we wouldn't eat it, because that would be a complete lie. We're just saying that it would be beneficial to everyone in the office to have bread and butter readily available.
Brad Got Bad Chinese And Evil Soup
Brad, thank you for being so open about your meal. We hope that you learned a valuable lesson in ordering properly. And kudos for labeling the rice, there was bound to be someone that would open that container. They would be very disappointed to see that it was bland white rice.
But this soup. If someone other than you eats it is the devil going to be summoned or something? The pentagram was a nice touch, but we don't think the devil is going to come to Earth over a bowl of soup. Then again, we have been wrong before.